My Acne Struggles

I have struggled throughout my entire life with the way that I look. A lot of these issues stem from my anxiety but I also deal with self-image problems. I have began to finally face these problems and accept who I am as a person. I know that I can’t change myself anymore to impress others but I can change what I do for myself to make myself feel better. I can’t wait for the day when I can actually look in the mirror and be okay with what the reflection looking back at me is.

One thing that I have changed drastically in order to help this is to change up my skin care routine. I have been in and out of the dermatologist's office since I was in eighth grade in an attempt to tame my cystic acne and the scarring the was occurring due to it. I had been trying to cover it since I decided it looked ugly in sixth grade. Granted no pimple or large pore is beautiful, I still thought that that would be all that people would focus on when looking at me. My mom supported me through the first appointment and I was put on two oral medications and a topical ointment. Alas, to this day, those medications and creams never worked for me and over the summer of 2016, my dermatologist put me on Accutane.

Now, the doctor told me to be cautious on the new medication and that I may experience side effects. Accutane is meant to be used only in severe cases such as mine where I had cystic acne that has not been helped by the many medications that I had taken and used. Therefore, if you have experienced acne and are thinking this might be the way to go, please, please, please discuss it with a professional first; I cannot stress that enough. I did experience quite a few side effects from Accutane. Dry, chapped lips that would crack and bleed almost everyday, bloody noses everyday for three weeks and then one to two every week after that, muscle and joint pain and soreness for the first four months of the medicine, dizziness, lightheadedness, and headaches. These side effects lasted for about the first four months and then faded but I still have bloody noses occasionally. In all honesty, it isn’t a fun thing to go through but I am finally realizing that all of this is paying off.

For once in my life, my acne was subsiding and flare ups weren’t occurring. I had to transfer to a different dermatologist once I got to the U of M but my new doctor was amazing and the Accutane was working better than ever. I was so happy that I was finally getting to see what I looked like without those horrid, painful cystic lumps that I was so used to.

I am currently on my last month of Accutane and I am really beginning to see a difference in my appearance. My roommates, friends, and family have all made comments on how great my skin is starting to look. I have began to use different face products and makeup since I started using Accutane and I have found products that have helped my skin feel and look healthier along with looking in the mirror and seeing someone looking back at me that I know, one day, I will be happy with.

Love,

Kaelyn Spencer